Coming back stronger

Fellow runners I’m back. Fellow runners I’m back fighting.

…well I wish that was the case.

I wish I could declare I was healed back to to normal.

What ever normal is…

The honest truth is I’m making slow progress day by day.

A lot slower than I’d like.

What I did do is make a decision.

I decided today that I’m not going to let depression rule anymore.

I can’t.

I’ve let it steal too much of my joy.

Too many days glued to my sofa unable to move.

I’m still afraid to go outside and leave the house.

I’m still filled with doubt and worry.

I’m still broken and empty.

But I’m hopeful.

Today I woke up and had a massage.

I started the day with a gratitude meditation.

Because the truth is no matter how frustrated I am with my situation.

No matter how angry I am that my life seems to have come to a halt – again.

No matter how much I want to scream, shout and cry.

There is so much to be grateful for.

A few weeks ago I had had enough and wanted to give up.

Today I’m grateful to be alive.

I’m grateful I woke up this morning.

I’m grateful for my loving supportive family.

I’m grateful I had energy to have a shower and come downstairs and have breakfast prepared for me.

Every day is tough.

A struggle.

But every day is a new day.

So I’ll cling onto that.

I’m making progress, moving forward – slowly.

Today I have hope that one day soon I’ll smile again.

Fellow runners let me know in the comments what small victory did you have today?

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